THE massively popular Transformers are back. And I am still trying to figure out why.
The simple reason is that it is a money-spinner.
This film franchise began in 2007 and was an instant hit with the generation that grew up with the action figures and animated series.
It was massively successful and prompted producers to pump out two more films.
Revenge of the Fallen (2009) met with terrible reviews but still bought in a lot of money.
With the release of the third instalment, Dark of the Moon, the Transformers cash cow has been used up.
Running at 2.5 hours long and with a major cast change, the script screams of unoriginality and pointlessness.
We meet up with Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf) as his gorgeous girlfriend Carly (Rosie Huntington Whiteley in her film debut) wakes him up.
Sam is fresh out of college, unemployed and determine to prove himself.
But a number of government cover-ups and silence agreements mean not many people believe what he has done to save the world.
While he tries to show he matters to the world, Optimus Prime and the Autobots are working for the US government as a sort of peacekeeping mercenaries.
But the Autobots soon find that their previous leader Sentinel Prime is on the moon with special fuel cells that can be made into a transportation device.
So the humans and the Autobots set out on a mission to revive and rescue Sentinel Prime while keeping the information from the evil Megatron and the Decepticons.
The whole plot is utterly confusing and overworked but the cinematography and action sequences are great.
Watch Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon official trailer
Never has a car transforming into an alien robot warrior looked so cool and director edMichael Bay has a made the battle scenes entertaining and innovative.
But the weirdness of the major villains is blatantly taken from other movies, with some sort of giant squid decepticon wreaking havoc as well as Megatron hiding his disfigurements (from the previous film) under a cloak.
The dialogue is clunky and obvious and while Rosie Huntington-Whitely is much nicer to listen to than Megan Fox, she is still just an unattainable damsel in distress.
Shia LeBeaouf slips into the role of determined and misunderstood Sam Witwicky easily and with so many excellent actors (Frances MacDormand, John Malkovich, John Turturro, Hugo Weaving and Leonard Nimoy) and voices involved in the film it is mystifying that the acting isn’t better than it is.
If you really want to see it, I would wait for the DVD; you won’t waste as much money and have the option of turning it off if you are struggling to finish the film.